Posted by: rachelanne229 | September 19, 2009

south pole

i am craving a trip to the antarctic.  there is something about a place so raw and so remote that makes its purity and its power magnetic to me.  i am not a person drawn to other people; i am a person drawn to nature.  not antisocial, but pro-natural life.  my sense of freedom comes from a run thru the pines or a kayak down a stream flanked by bright blue phlox and the stirring of insects.  i like the crunch of dirt and snow under my feet, not the scratching of asphalt.  fresh air and the scent of decaying leaves lead me to inspiration, but the sight of tall buildings and crowded buses numb my soul.

feelings like these can’t be unique, but they are selfish.  i want the earth for my own; i don’t want to share with countless hordes of strangers.  from katahdin to yellowstone to alaska to australia, we’ve developed a paradox.  these pristine oases draw tourists by the thousands, yet their beauty is unsustainable in the light of so much human access.  ironic, really.  let me loose on a backwoods trail in late september, let me loose down a steep ski trail on the back of the mountain, let me loose in a kayak down the prestile stream, and i will find my freedom, my peace of mind, my strength.  i want to run free and run hard, but the effects of human society and urban life are crippling and suffocating.  people flock to these retreats, only to find more people waiting outside the door to be let in, and hurrying to take up some space before someone else gets it first.

as selfish, as intolerant, as greedy as it may be, i want more freedom, i want more space, i want more room to grow.  and i still want to go to antarctica.



  1. I guess this busts my ideas that I was the only one to feel this way. My family runs a campground and all summer long we are inundated by people from away telling us how beautiful this space is. Granted, we depend upon them for a livelihood, but everyone in the family agrees fall is the best season because “we get our space back.” With a world so full of people is it a selfish desire to have the wilderness? Perhaps, but I think you hit upon the crux of it all. Somewhere within our souls is a primitive urging for the wild, for those spaces not yet domesticated by humanity. Its a strange contradiction when the very preservation of these spaces necessitates the people that crave them staying away. I don’t know the answer, but you certainly pose a damn moving question.

    • thanks for the comment and sorry for the slow reply. i’m glad to see someone is reading the blabber i send out into cyberspace! speaking of beauty in nature–we got a fair amount of snowfall time in this evening. yay or nay? i think pre-halloween is much too early to be rejoicing about icy precip.

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